Thankfulness

This week turned out to be a shocker for the whole colony, we lost Ruben, one of our own, in a sudden heartbeat gone bad. Sunday was his sister Clara's birthday, and we sang and wished her a happy one, no one dreaming what would take place that day. Some of the younger girls even sent her well wishes and a song on the Sunday Request Show for fun.

My emotions were kind of mixed all week, should I be glad he didn't and doesn't have to suffer anymore, or sad that he is gone and will be missed by all? He was the colony's one man clean-up crew, carrying trash and slop to the dump. He had some challenges but a character that made this place more interesting and alive.

Jake Vetter from Oakbluff held the sermon and challenged us to be ready at all times to meet the Lord. He talked about the frailty of life and reminded us to clean up our relationships. Is there one person with who we would need to talk to if we knew we were going to die today?

My personal challenge is about the One who took away my garbage and my stinking, roting sins. How much do I love Him? Jesus was also humble, simple, and a servant to all. Do I love Him only because of what He did for me? Sure, I was thankful to Ruben for what he did for me, and said it to him a few times, but doesn't God want more than thanks? Doesn't He want all my life and love to be poured out for others as His was? He was a servant washing feet, much like Ruben, and said that if we want to be great in the kingdom of heaven be the slave. How often do we leave the dirty work for someone else?

I just love songs about heaven, I think that they are fast becoming my favorites. It is a pleasure trying to imagine how it will be there, not the beauty, I can't begin to see that, but just deleting earthly things like dust, sweat, temptation, pain, sickness, burdens and cares. No one will want to shut me up there for singing praises to God too loudly. I do have much to be thankful for, and we are always complaining to God at church how no mouth or tough can praise Him enough. Well, there is the praise of a quiet heart, but then, what your heart is full of comes out by the mouth.

I should post this ironic poem that I wrote many, many years ago. Why is crying the only socially acceptable thing to do when you are overjoyed? I am so thankful at times that all I can do is weep, just look at what I have been given. My husband, my two little angels, a home, food to overflow, clothes, my health, friends, help, and those are only the physical blessings, look at what God has done, called me his own child, saved me, washed me from my sins, showed me mercy and grace that I can't seem to ever deserve no matter how hard I try. I guess I've always been a very expressive person, so here it is.

Joy
I can’t clap my hands and I can’t dance
My song and my holler are much too loud
No laughing, no leaping, no raising my hands
Oh, what shall I do, but sit down and weep
For happiness